good clean fun

I knew from the first time I met Phil he was nuts. It was my third night working at Target as a night stock boy when I met Phil. I would have met him on the first night except he was away for quality training. Later he revealed that quality training actually meant sitting outside target in a parked car with the day manager discussing their hostile takeover of the payless shoe store next door. I never questioned him, I just assumed he was nuts.

We were both assigned to the sporting goods area and after loading our merchandise tugs we dug into the task of taking care of all of this crap. As I jammed basketball needles onto their respective hooks I heard Phil talking to himself in the aisle over. He was muttering something about how camping was a complete fraud and if anyone really wanted to go camping he's gladly kidnap them and drop them off in the country for the $65 it took to buy a tent. I laughed inside and agreed, but thought about the smores I had eaten years ago.

I was putting golf tees away when i looked up to see Phil staring at me. I said "Do you know where these fuckers go?" Phil replied "Did you check the plan-o-gram". I looked away knowing that the plan-o-gram was bullshit and all I had to do was find the same bar code number on a label as the package. "I've got to take a leak" and before I could argue Phil was down the aisle and around the corner.

It was an hour later and Phil hadn't returned. i had finished the bike and cooler aisle. I glanced sorely down the camping aisle. I closed in on Phil's tug and saw a pack of opened flashlights. He hadn't taken care of anything. I wondered how Phil kept his job as i finished the flashlights and moved on to various other camping gadgets, some of this stuff was pretty ridiculous. I mean, who needs a stainless steel spork?

I reached into my back pocket and pulled out the walkie talkie with bent antennae. It was 3:15 and closing in on break time. I put the walkie talkie up to my lips and said "Paging Phil, has anyone seen Phil?" I need him to sign off on the plan-o-gram before I could complete the area. Waiting... Not a word. Phil then walked around the corner "So man, jason had me stocking some endcaps near the checkouts and I forgot about you back here". I replied "That's fine, I just need you to sign off this area with me so I can go to break". He grabbed the clipboard and scribbled his name in my box "Here ya go". I looked at him and said "Thanks".

We took our break in the garden center because

What are we bailing out?

Richard Wagoner - CEO of GM


Robert Nardelli - CEO of Chrysler


Alan Mullaly - CEO of Ford


Ron Gettelfinger - UAW President

The root of the problem is they have been selling us poison. Where is my electric car made of recycled material? Where is the innovation? Where is my subcompact electric car? Where is my autopod that drives itself? ... The truth is they are out to loot and plunder society. The truth is they are old out-dated machines of war. It's not just the U.S. auto industry, it's the entire way we think about transportation. We need to focus on a renewable modern way of transportation.

Thanksgiving Dinner

Turkey
Butternut Squash with Browned butter
Stuffing/Dressing
Mashed Potatoes and Gravy
Green Bean Casserole
Broccoli Cornbread
Cranberry Sauce
Cranberry Pumpkin Cookies